The one about Christmas

4 May


Yes, yes, I know, I know, I’m several months out, but believe me, I’ve rarely been so comprehensively mired within a festive mindset.  The other one who’s several months out of synch, you see, is L2, and his powers of persuasion and consistent insistence are legendary.

Over the last three nights we have had to read two Christmas-themed books.  The first is complicated.  It has inserts, letters in envelopes from Holly to Santa’s elf (whose name temporarily escapes me) that have to be extracted, carefully read, refolded (all by L2, you understand) and reinserted into said envelopes.  In addition, the elf responds to Holly with various ‘Christmas gifts’, admittedly inventive paper engineering that also has to be extracted from an envelope, viewed and admired, then lengthily re-inserted.  The whole process brings storytime in at around 30 minutes, which when the dog’s scratching at the back door and it takes about five minutes to make it down a flight of stairs in the current physical climate, is to be honest, a mite too long.  A pretty hefty mite.

The second book is less complicated in design but way more complicated in content and tone.  I am embarrassed to name it, in fact, due to this admission, but I keep on reading it wrong (and that isn’t just down to the current state of convalescence; during normal service I also have the same difficulty).  The text layout is, not to put too fine a point on it, bemusing, running willy-nilly across a double page spread in parts, and limiting itself to a sidebar in others.  Which came first, the lengthy sentence or the cropped?  Not, in this case, a query I can readily answer.

Now, I wouldn’t mind if we were in December, even, possibly the end of November.  My tolerance for a lengthy Christmas is wide, deep and mainly fuelled by the apparent permissibility of having a drink regularly at about 10.45am, for no particular reason, plus being able to belt out corking hymns I actually know in church.  What’s not to love?  But I do have limits, and they’re probably about six weeks long. Being compelled by a four-year-old to read recipes for marshmallow hot chocolate and chant ‘happy Christmas everyone’ on the Friday of May Bank Holiday isn’t, however, quite in the window.

I can feel patience wearing thin.  One more festive read, and Santa’s visit just might be abandoned in 2012.  Watch this space…


One Response to “The one about Christmas”

  1. adollyciousirony May 13, 2012 at 9:50 am #

    Hello my dear friend, thanks for the follow and nice meeting your here via Word Press. Please accept my nomination for you to receive “Tell Me Bout Yourself Award” here:
    Enjoy and have fun blogging

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