If kids spell ‘love’ ‘t-i-m-e’

13 Oct

Two landmarks approach apace. My 21st birthday, at the start of next year (see dictionary definition of ‘denial’) and L1’s move from primary to secondary school. The former event is currently dead to me as the latter event – with open days and agonising about the ‘right thing to do’ – is occupying quite a bit of temporal and mental space right now. And also I’m not ready to turn ‘new 21’ as I still consider myself something around ‘old 21’, only with more grey hairs and assorted scars.

In the past, I would not have defined an event taking place in five or eleven months, as the above two are, as ‘approaching apace’. But yesterday I realised that in two weeks time we head back up North to reprise last October’s ‘long march’, a trip which as far as I can tell took place about six weeks ago, not fifty weeks ago. And my job requires a lot of future planning, consistently thinking a month, three months, even six months ahead, working on projects to influence outcomes during the next quarter, rarely tomorrow.

All this does not sit easily with my commitment to live in the moment and take in as much as I can of my kids while their own pace of change continues exponential. When you’re forward-planning for four days a week it can slip into normal life as well; reaching for the future becomes commonplace even though I know full well that the future, and where I am now, will collide soon enough.

Once again, this weekend, I received a timely reminder to concentrate on the now. And it came from an internet meme, on Facebook, saying that kids spell love ”t-i-m-e’.

Reading that made me realise that just now, with things so busy, I am spending too much time contemplating what happens next and not enough time acknowledging what is happening now. So we headed out to a country park for the afternoon, no plans, and simply enjoyed what we did right then, as it happened. More of the same, please, more of the same.

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